What do you do when sex becomes a chore;  when it becomes about the act, rather than the endless possibilities of physical express?  Here’s a short transcript from a brilliant video by psychologist Esther Perel on the difference between sexuality and eroticism – must watch!

Transcript:  So, one way to distinguish between sexuality and eroticism, which I think is actually a profound distinction, is that animals have sex and it is the nature, it is the primary urge, it is the instinct, it is procreative. We have an erotic life. We transform sexuality. We socialize sexuality through our imagination. And the central agent of the erotic act is our creativity, our imagination, or ability to renew, our ability to anticipate, to imagine ourselves in an act in which we may have a blissful time with multiple orgasms without touching anybody just because we can imagine ourselves in it. We can envision the act without having to actually enact it. And it is the cultivation of pleasure for its own sake. But I think modernity really narrowed the erotic into its bare sexual meaning. Whereas historically the mystics looked at eroticism as that capacity of maintaining aliveness, vibrancy, vitality, life source, life energy. Esther Perel

You can watch the full video here:  Big Think.